I love to shop. I use to hate it. I take that back. I used to not like it when I didn't have any money. Then God invented the credit card and bestowed it upon me and all was good with the world.
I'm a hoarder. A shopper x10. And having Bipolar, I go hog wild when it comes to shopping. It's one of the manic side effects. I love it. My husband doesn't. Neither does our bank account. So, I'm really trying to learn to control myself. Especially after I spent about $5,000.00 in one month. Whoooieeee, that's the month my husband took my credit cards away.
I've earned back one.
And, I've learned to limit my shopping to under $100.00 at a time. But, I'm still a hoarder. I love sales. Walmart had tank tops on sale for $3.00 the other day. So, what did I do. Get one in every color I liked. Did I have to? Wouldn't one or two have done just as well? I'm sure they would have to a normal person, but not to my way of thinking.
And, I hoard toilet paper and paper towels. You should see my garage. It's like the paper aisle at a grocery store. And, don't even look in the closet in my bathroom. You'll find 8, yes I said EIGHT, deodorants, 5 bottles of shampoo, 4 bottles of body soap, probably about 4 packages of q-tips, and the list goes on and on. I really hate to run out of things. I like to have a lot on hand in case for some reason we can't get to the store for awhile like in a hurricane and we need these things. Especially TOILET PAPER!!
For me, shopping gives me a HIGH. That feeling that some people get from doing extreme sports or maybe even drugs. I go into a zone and when I come out of it, I'm walking out of the store with bags of things. All of the things are good, usable and wearable. Nothing freaky like a talking bass fish on a plaque or anything weird like that. I just get caught up in the shopping and can't stop myself. I hear a lot of Bipolars are like that. It's all part of being manic.
But, when I'm not manic, I can mostly keep myself under control. But, the need to get the "high" feeling is still there. It's like needing my "fix". I gotta have it. So, I soothe myself with a trip to the grocery store. Where I can load up on paper towels, toilet paper, and paper plates. Can't have enough paper plates.
All who are interested in learning more about Mental Health issues are welcome. I write from experience. I have PTSD, chronic, major depressive disorder (medication resistant), Attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, unspecified type, Generalized anxiety disorder, obsessive compulsive disorder, unspecified, mild cognitive impairment, social phobia, generalized, unspecified mood (affective) disorder. I am a Mental Health Advocate and certified in Mental Health First Aid.
